Friday, February 26, 2010

Have you ever felt like you were next do your father after he had passed? Like you were in his presense?

Disappointingly, no. I always wished for that, though I know he is with me through my bad times and that he is always watching over me. As for actually feeling his presence, I don't think I have ever felt it like that.

What happened with your mamma?

My birth mom left me and my dad when I was two. We do not talk that often, last time I saw her was last year around christmas when she visited me in the hospital. She is remarried and has three children. I wish I had the balls to call her but I really don't. She hasn't called me on any holidays or my birthday and I feel that is her job to do that. As I said in another answer, we are both very stubborn.

How many times have you had to go to the doctor this year?

In 2009 I was hospitalized around seven times for different reasons. It is embarrassing to say but it is true. Mostly for my extreme anxiety and medication stabilization. An antidepressant I was on made me very suicidal. I was also in an eating disorder clinic. That, I never really understood. I have been to the ER a few times for dehydration, med side effects, and other things. I have been going to the doctor a lot this year for physical health problems. This is probably too much information for the internet but I am trying to be very honest.

What mental illness are you most intrigued by?

After being in the hospital I am very interested in people with schizophrenia. I am puzzled by how they are diagnosed. One man told the doctors that Jesus taught him how to play the piano. How do the doctors know he didn't really do that? I have never experience hearing voices and I am interested in how people deal with that, and if they even know that the voices aren't really there.

What's your favorite word?

My favorite word to write in cursive is "beautiful." Lately I like the word "ruse."



katieleigh said...

thank you for your honesty.

i like your blog, creepy pictures and all x

zachary said...

You are so so beautiful..i will definitely subscribe to your honesty.